Abortion

There are lots of debates online that devoted to the topic about abortion. However emotionally or morally seemed correct to both side of debate, there is no way to solve this human problem just by claiming opinion that what’s the right and what’s wrong. Many attempt to argue abortion is the same as murder; many try to bring it with the woman’s right to control their own body. Eventually lead to the argument about definition of life, how to define human, and the specific age (in terms of weeks) to justify whether or not a group of atoms are considered a life.

But no matter how controversial this topic is, we are pretty sure religion will be a poor tool to help us to understand it. In any point throughout history, religion always gave us a seemingly clear and incontestable answer, but those answers changed with time and, of course, with the advancement of science. Without science, tool would not be available to examine the heartbeat of fetus in picture and be shown as an emotional appeal to outlaw abortion. Without science, there is no way that religious people can observe the formation of embryo and claim the holiness of life and the sin of ending a life.

Surely it is reassuring to believe that there is a god or gods who know which is right, or to believe there is a thing call “human right” can guide us without errors. But none of them is evident.

“Better by far to embrace the hard truth than a reassuring fable.” – Carl Sagan

G and K make all the difference, but can we see beyond that?

A few years ago, I went to a school to prepare for an upcoming TOEFL (Test of English as a Foreign Language) test. Although it was a short program, I had a good time there that summer. And I also made a lot of friends came from all over the world, like Japan, Peru, Brazil, Argentina, France, Spain, and Turkey. I think the class was a good way to learn the speaking and listening part of English because students can heard various accents and distinguish their own pronunciation errors which could cause misunderstanding. However, I was not anticipating that one day miscommunication could happen to me.

One sunny afternoon, during a short break from the class, I was in meditation and was not in a talking mood. A few classmates were talking and one guy from Peru turned to me and asked me something in a Peruvian accent, and I heard: “Hey, are you a gay?”

“What?” I was not sure how to react.

“Are you o’ gay?” I assumed that “o” and “a” pronounced similarly in Spanish.

“No.” I was curious why he asked that question.

“What’s wrong? Did you go to see a doctor?”

“Err…No.” I thought I just answered his question, but why did he keep asking me like I am? However, even if I were gay, I don’t agree anyone should go to a doctor just because he is a gay.

“You should go to a doctor if you feel sick,” he added. He looked very serious.

I started to suspect something was wrong, especially the last word he said. I think nobody would be that rude anywhere in the world. So, I asked, “Can you repeat the first question?”

This time he slowed down a bit, and pronounced it carefully. “Are you okay?”

Finally, I noticed the “k” was not a “g,” it was “okay,” not “a gay.”

And then we laughed so hard that everyone on the same floor can heard it.

It was a funny experience. But looking back, I feel the event was significant in some way to let me understand why there are many conflicts and disputes in this world.

There are thousands of languages on Earth. Even within the same language, there exist different accents or dialects to separate us. Language barrier create culture barrier; culture barrier create mistrust; mistrust create perpetual hatred. As a result, political, territorial, economical, racial, and ideological conflicts seem endless; wars sparked between counties and within counties seem unavoidable. Often, they would say they were fighting for a righteous reason. But, actually, childish is the only way to describe it if we can look from a perspective outside our selfishness nature and see humanity as a single organism. If we can just sit down, clear some misunderstanding, and learn more about each other before fighting each other to misery every time we encounter something we don’t agree with, what’s left could be a good laugh instead.

It is to say that long ago, human used to have only one language and they stayed together to build a tower call Babel to reach heavens. So, God or gods, afraid of mankind to exceed they purpose to do, went down to earth and scattered them upon the Earth, and confused their language. But it may just another reassuring tale to explain our self-destruction tendency and our inability to unite. I believe human are more capable of greatness. Together, we can achieve more than Babel Tower, if we give ourselves a worthy goal.

About Occupy Wall Street

Lately, I was thinking about how monetary system work, about the claims in Zeitgeist Movement, and scientific method. All these things I read, watch, and hear started to build up like a snow ball, while I have been pushed to have a job.

How Richard Feynman said about “Cargo Cult Science.”

What Michael Shermer wrote about belief system in “TheBelieving Brain.”

How Carl Sagan’s Cosmos talked about “sees the earth as asingle organism”

Also, the story in “Foundation And Earth” by Isaac Asimov, which is about the ultimate plan for human’s greater good.

The Credit Crisis in2008

At the same time, I was monitoring “Occupy Wall Street” and other similar movement around the US. Yeah, I think most of videos I saw on Youtube were pretty much pathetic. The point they should make is to spread messages, not to create mass with police.

But I wonder why they felt it is the fault of the top 1% but not the system. As “The Believing Brain” said, human need to personalize things happened around them in order to understand them, just like the old myths talks about winds, rains, volcanoes, earthquakes.

“We started to ask questions but there were no answers to befound; winds, rains, volcanoes, earthquakes; the rulers of life and death, theyseemed to be alive; they seemed to have a will of their own; so we got scared.”

Human being should not be blamed. It is the system we set up long ago that we haven’t thinks much of.

I think people have faith in monetary system is just like religion, many great scientist in history assume the existence of god and unmovable heaven without ever question it. Isaac Newton not only explains how to calculate gravitation, but he also “saw God as the masterful creator whose existence could not be denied in the face of the grandeur of all creation”, and an alchemist. And it is Aristotle who helped to hold the dominant view that the earth is the center of universe for nearly 1300 years.

The ultimate question is: How can we know which thing we believe is relatively right or wrong?

How do we know the system itself is the cause, not individual in the system or other variables?

Scientific method is the best way we know, but it needs time.

I hope it is not too late.

*you should click the link above if you are interestedhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvfAtIJbatg&feature=channel_video_title#t=05m12sZ

Purpose of Life

So, what is the point of living a life? I mean, for all those people telling me what life is all about, none of them make sense for me. Having a big house to live so you can spend the whole weekend to clean up the shit? Having a car to drive so you can have the freedom to crash into another car someday and perhaps have a lucky kill? Having a fixed sex mate so one day you can get tired of and have a divorce, spend the rest of your life finding another person to get rid of, and watching movie all day trying to figure out why love cannot be forever? In the sense of happiness, money make little difference if it is enough to support the basic of living.  The pride of wealthiness disappear if you compare yourself with many more wealthy person.

There is no point in life. We are just a phenomenon happen on one point in this vast cosmos, just like lifeless dust, gas, planet, star, and galaxy. We create arbitrary purposes for ourselves because natural selection require us to do so.

And that's all I have to said after I drank a cup of coffee.

Bad Dream

Last night, I dreamed about going back to Taiwanese Military for some unknown reason. Although it was probably the worst dream I can have, somehow I knew it is not real even it seemed real in every bit of my vision. I knew it is not real instantly because my skin still feel comfortable and there were not a single heavy weight on my shoulder.


However, the intense psychological pressure was still present. In the dream, they told me I still have few days left and so I followed the crowd and soon made formation just like we used to. After a while, again for no apparent reason, they picked me from the the formation, and started to tell me I have a very serious discipline problem, because I behaved like I have higher education so I don't have to follow their instruction, like I sometimes been told.

And then, I can not remember the rest of the dream.

The most uncomfortable and undesirable thing always going to be repeated in my dream, whether it was about my future or the past. Sadly, I cannot do anything about it. Right now, what I can do is just step by step and looking forward. Maybe, go toward a brighter future.

Being Free

Sometimes I don't quite aware that I finally being free of doing lots of things. Since I got out from military, I stopped feel being threaten and forced to do anything I don't want to. But I think whatever I try, I just can't forgot my life in military. Even now, I feel I am on a vacation and I have to go back again, just like old times.
Anyway, my real new life began here in Pleasant Hill, California. I am pretty glad the weather is great, food is normal regardless how they said back in Taiwan, and people are generally friendly. Maybe I like here because I wanted to, like I hate Taiwanese Army because I intended to do so. But I don't care. Flash back to 8 years ago, I were still a freshman at high school, and I had always been terrified to think what job I am going to do, how life will suffer if I ever grow up. Right now, the future is never clearer than ever. There will be bumps along the road, but I can see it now.

--Do you believe it?
We're gonna make it now
And I can see it

I can see it now.

"Mine" by Taylor Swift --------"Mine" music video

I thought...

I thought I want to search something interesting on the internet, but what I did is just spending my time escaping reality.

I thought I hate Taiwan, but what I actually hate is part of many unsolvable problems all around the world.

I thought I grow up during the past year, but I still look like I just finished a crappy education without skill and knowledge.

I thought I will be better, but I am not.

I thought I can be more optimistic, but it is hard.

My military life left only 53 days.

How did I made it through 282 days? I don’t know.


But I know I can not look back.

Cold

I feel cold, not particularly because it's winter, but also because I feel cold inside. And I fear about ever going back to this island and ever mention this sad place in my rest of life. I feel pain in my bone, because I always have to carry something heavy or something troublesome. My hands are still grubby with dirt, lie, and shame that can never be washed out. My feet are hurt because I was forced to wearing uncomfortable boots and trapped inside without freedom. For me, this place is only served to torture young people both mentally and physically with excessive government power. Even worst, the very kind of volunteers is the kind with poor economic condition, broken family, or social disorder. In the result, this environment is filled with violence and it spread like a disease. I’m tired of this, but the end is still far away.